Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Tourette's at 30,000 Feet

As always - The Cast of Characters

Me (The Daddy)

The Bean: Age 8
The Butterfly: Age 6
The Darling Wife
The Buffett Puppy 

So, I'm traveling again.  Flying weekly to the middle of Massachusetts.  Away from the DW.  Away from The Bean and The Butterfly.

Flying out of the lovely Hartsfield-Jackson airport is always a challenge.  Especially when all the flights from the previous day were canceled.  Especially when you miss your flight.

All of the flights to Boston were booked.  For the entire day.  Tomorrow wasn't looking any better.  Stranded in Atlanta?  I can think of worse fates.

I'd just go home.  Hang out with The Bean.  Play with The Butterfly.  Spend a quality Sunday with the fam.

The DW was having none of it.  "How did you miss your flight?"

I explain that I thought I was on a later one.

The DW is unimpressed.  "Didn't you check your itinerary?" she asks.

"Apparently not," I reply.

"Well, you better figure out a way to get there."

I finagle a flight to Manchester, NH.  At 8:30 PM.  It was around 2 PM when I finagled it.

So time passes like molasses.  At last the hour nears. 

I settle into my seat and start to drift off.  "Pretzels!" somebody calls.

"Popcorn!" she yells again.

I momentarily think I'm at a Sporting Event.  But she never calls 'Beer!"

It turns out that three rows ahead of her, some guy is playing Family Feud on his computer.  She's volunteering answers.  FROM THREE ROWS BACK.

Turns out I was the only one trying to sleep.  The entire cabin got into the act.

Ain't traveling glam?


Sunday, March 7, 2010

Daddy - Daughter Dance

As always - The Cast of Characters

Me (The Daddy)

The Bean: Age 8
The Butterfly: Age 6
The Darling Wife
The Buffett Puppy 
Every year or so, there is a night where the Daddies dress up and take their daughters to a ball.  
The theme this year was "A Night in Central Park".  The Bean and The Butterfly looked beautiful in their Princess-style dresses.  The men were all wearing ties.
Yes, ties.
All except for yours truly, who has all but forgotten to tie a tie.
Pre-party, I take the girls to Benihana.  The Butterfly hates Japanese food.

Except she doesn't.  She has yet to meet a Chicken Tempura she didn't like.

She eats all of her chicken and a half plate of Fried Rice.  And Ice Cream.  A big bowl of Ice Cream.

We get to the party and their are pony-drawn carriages that clop across the parking lot.

"Where do the horses go potty?" wonders a curious Bean.

She is informed that the horses are wearing diapers.  She makes a face.

"Are the diapers, like, full?"

She is informed that they are.

"That is so gross!"  I am inclined to agree.

We hit the Dance Floor and The Bean wants to dance.  She wants to be spun around just like the Princesses in the Disney movies.

The Butterfly, however, does not.  She wants to wrap herself around my leg and hide.

But then a song called "Cotton Eyed Joe" comes on.  The Butterfly apparently likes then song.  She jumps ON THE STAGE and DANCES. 

The Butterfly is following in her Daddy's footsteps.  

I've never met a stage I didn't like.

But I can't help but wonder.  What exactly is a Cotton Eyed Joe?

Monday, March 1, 2010

But Beanie, It's Cold Outside

As always - The Cast of Characters

Me (The Daddy)

The Bean: Age 8
The Butterfly: Age 6
The Darling Wife
The Buffett Puppy 

OK, so now it snows in Atlanta.  Pretty sure that wasn't in the brochure.

But in Atlanta, when the first flake of the first flurry drifts innocently through the sky, the entire city shuts down.

This means SNOW DAY for the younger set, The Bean and The Butterfly included.

The DW goes to work.  She is a Super Trouper.  Yes, I mean that in ABBA sort of way.

But The  Bean and The Butterfly are strangers to snow.  They throw on their thick winter coats.  And their Crocs.

Yes, their Crocs.  

They want to make Snow Angels in the very place that The Buffett Puppy makes his poo patties.

Poop Angels?

And now I will attempt to channel Dean Martin.  With apologies, of course, to Dean Martin.

Daddy, we want to play
(But Beanie, it's cold outside)
It's a beautiful day
(But Beanie, it's cold outside)

The snow is a-falling
(But Beanie, it's cold outside)
The snow is a-calling
(But Beanie, it's cold outside)

It all looks so nice
(But Beanie, it's as cold as ice)
The flakes fall like rice
(But Beanie, that doesn't make any sense)

Daddy, put on your sweats
(But Beanie, it's so cold and wet)
And look for my hat
(But Beanie, I don't want to do that)

Daddy, let's go!
(But Beanie, it's cold outside)
Let's play in the snow!
(But Beanie, it's cold outside)


So, we play in the snow.

And it's cold outside.