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Monday, September 7, 2009

Potty Training - It Isn't Just For Kids Anymore

As always - The Cast of Characters

Me (The Daddy)
The Bean: Age 7
The Butterfly: Age 5
The Darling Wife

First off, I want to acknowledge a fellow lunatic The Crazy Baby Mama. Her blog is amazing - funny and informative.  She's also on Facebook, so Find, Fan and Follow.

Now on with the show...

Potty Training.  The Bean didn't like being potty trained, but she also didn't like sitting in poop.  So grudgingly, she accepted that sitting on a kid toilet (the cleaning of which is much nastier than a diaper) was better than the alternative.

At the same time, the DW and I were retraining ourselves as well.  We both had bad cases of potty mouth.

We are actually lucky that one of The Bean's first words was "Duck".

Now obviously, nobody wants to have the kid who's shouting obscenities in the classroom.  It would be preferable if our children never heard a stray word until they've sat through Back to the Future or at least E.T.  Given my druthers, I would require them to weather 4 hours of Gone With The Wind just so Clark can finally tell Vivien how he really feels.

But that's just not reality.  Grammy has been known to drop a swear on occasion.  She likes to say, if they've never heard it, they don't know what it means.  Besides, she says, they're just words.

Fast forward to a 3-year-old Bean.  She's standing in our kitchen with a sippy cup of milk.  Suddenly, the blinds come crashing down on the floor.  She cocks her head and says something that rhymes with "Duck".

We weren't sure what to do.  The Bean, our precious little 3-year-old, has just dropped the F-Bomb.  The King of Curses.  The Mack Daddy of Swears.  One of George Carlin's seven dirty words.

I was honestly not sure how to handle it.  Certainly, a 3-year-old shouldn't even know, much less utter, the forbidden word.  However, given the context of blinds coming crashing down to the floor, it seemed apropos.

So I just laughed.

I didn't even fix the blinds.

Since then, The Bean has become a 7-year-old Puritan.  She even made a sign that says No Sh*T.

1 comment:

  1. A few of weeks ago, my eight-year-old said the F word standing in the kitchen as if it was just another ordinary word.

    I said, "Don't EVER say that word again."

    She asked, "Why not?"

    I said, "Because it's a VERY bad word and I don't EVER want to hear it come out of your mouth again."

    "Then why do you say it?" she asked.

    Gulp.

    Last week, the four-year-old said sh!t, getting out of the car at preschool.

    I don't think I curse much. But, apparently, I do more than I am aware. Someone's probably going to need to wash my mouth out with soap or something.

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